yo
jobs r great.
weather is chilly.
tea is hot.
looking forward to new years.
moving into katies house.
need to save money better.
want a sequin dress.
everybodyloveeverybody.
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Friday, November 13, 2009
seize sure
last night i had a seizure.
in a bar.
i lost control of my body as it shook from below me. i was seeing black then sight then black then sight. i was hot and dizzy. like taking a whip-it. warm through. i grabbed onto katie and told her to take me somewhere. on the way to the bathroom i collapsed on the floor shaking. then she helped me up and i laid on the bathroom floor a minute feeling nauseous but not vomiting.
today would be teddy's bday. it's friday the thirteenth.
in a bar.
i lost control of my body as it shook from below me. i was seeing black then sight then black then sight. i was hot and dizzy. like taking a whip-it. warm through. i grabbed onto katie and told her to take me somewhere. on the way to the bathroom i collapsed on the floor shaking. then she helped me up and i laid on the bathroom floor a minute feeling nauseous but not vomiting.
today would be teddy's bday. it's friday the thirteenth.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
dumb
homie asked me to lunch and i said no. (i had to work)
i think i'm going to invite him to the halloween. he better come.
i think i'm going to invite him to the halloween. he better come.
Monday, October 26, 2009
recap
catching up:
on wednesday erica flew home. that night i went out with this okc dude jasper. he was not as cute as his pictures and he had a speech impediment. we bought some tallboys at safeway and drank them in duboce park for almost an hour and then i went home. i wont be seeing him again.
on thursday i texted john like a retard,
"sup john u workin tonight?"
"sup playa.. yeah i am"
on friday i awoke to a text from amit asking about putting his shelves up. i got ready as quickly ass i could and started walking down to his place but on the way there i got a text that he had to go to the office so i should just see him on monday.
i walked back home and then had the whole morning to chill before going to pick up my paycheck. i smoked a lil bit with matt and cody and then emailed peeps about apartments and rooms for rent. i found this apt in the mission with three gals in their 20s, fully furnished room and no deposit for dec 1st. we have been emailing each other back and forth and i am going to check out the place on tuesday night.
around 2:45 i went to the market to get cash back for the muni and then rode to papyrus where i picked up my first paycheck and found out that i've been placed at the Montgomery store. I guess this store is smaller and opens/closes earlier. whatever. the manager's name is svetlana.
from there i proceeded to get ripped off by taco bell paying $3:82 for a cheesy gordita crunch (best one i've ever had tho, i swear). and then i got on bart and headed to oakland. sophie and i met up and went to her place and ate soup and pet bobby and chilled hard until katie got off work and came to meet us.
then we set out on the road to big sur.
so much giggle town, girl talk and in n out.
we got to esalen around 10:30pm and had some beers with katie's mom (and dad, who decided to come help his ex-wife move and make everyone's lives hella awkward for the weekend) and then we went to bed. in the morning we went to esalen for breakfast and sat outside overlooking the ocean and bronzing in the sun. we moved katie's mom's house and had more delicious num nums, laid in the grass, read books, played cards, drank beers, then we headed back to property for dinner with a bottle of wine. we ate dinner at the bar with our bottle and then got in the natural hot spring tubs on the cliff of the ocean. (right?!) i got all emo and nauseous and then i threw up. i drove us all home in sophies car and we passed out.
on sunday we got up and ate breakfast and then sophie did some yoga and i took a nap in the sun and then sophie and i went to brunch. after brunch we walked down thru the garden to the coast and climbed rocks and got our feet in the water. some birds ate the togo food we wrapped up for katie.
at 2pm we left big sur and a few hrs later we were eating in n out again and going to the pumpkin patch. we got hella pumps and cracked so many jokes and laughed at all the babies in their costumes having to pose for photographs.
at this time i texted john,
"we carving pumpkins later tonight at my place. u in?"
nothing.
we got back to the city a little before 8 and everyone helped us carry in our pumpkins. we made hard apple cider and had a carve fest.
we are having a halloween party on saturday and the theme is the nightmare before christmas, so all of our pumpkins we xmas themed. i made a snowman on fire. and a little heart pumpkin. lots of folks came over and it was just so super fun.
at 8:54pm i get a text from john,
"Lucille I am drizzzzzzzzzzzunked.. Hard to text.. Hard to focus.. Have fune.."
what an asshole.
today i am going to work for amit for a few hours and then head over to montgomery for the first time and see how it goes. tonight katie's dad is coming to the city and they are having dinner together. i might just kick it real low key-z.
i love cali.
on wednesday erica flew home. that night i went out with this okc dude jasper. he was not as cute as his pictures and he had a speech impediment. we bought some tallboys at safeway and drank them in duboce park for almost an hour and then i went home. i wont be seeing him again.
on thursday i texted john like a retard,
"sup john u workin tonight?"
"sup playa.. yeah i am"
on friday i awoke to a text from amit asking about putting his shelves up. i got ready as quickly ass i could and started walking down to his place but on the way there i got a text that he had to go to the office so i should just see him on monday.
i walked back home and then had the whole morning to chill before going to pick up my paycheck. i smoked a lil bit with matt and cody and then emailed peeps about apartments and rooms for rent. i found this apt in the mission with three gals in their 20s, fully furnished room and no deposit for dec 1st. we have been emailing each other back and forth and i am going to check out the place on tuesday night.
around 2:45 i went to the market to get cash back for the muni and then rode to papyrus where i picked up my first paycheck and found out that i've been placed at the Montgomery store. I guess this store is smaller and opens/closes earlier. whatever. the manager's name is svetlana.
from there i proceeded to get ripped off by taco bell paying $3:82 for a cheesy gordita crunch (best one i've ever had tho, i swear). and then i got on bart and headed to oakland. sophie and i met up and went to her place and ate soup and pet bobby and chilled hard until katie got off work and came to meet us.
then we set out on the road to big sur.
so much giggle town, girl talk and in n out.
we got to esalen around 10:30pm and had some beers with katie's mom (and dad, who decided to come help his ex-wife move and make everyone's lives hella awkward for the weekend) and then we went to bed. in the morning we went to esalen for breakfast and sat outside overlooking the ocean and bronzing in the sun. we moved katie's mom's house and had more delicious num nums, laid in the grass, read books, played cards, drank beers, then we headed back to property for dinner with a bottle of wine. we ate dinner at the bar with our bottle and then got in the natural hot spring tubs on the cliff of the ocean. (right?!) i got all emo and nauseous and then i threw up. i drove us all home in sophies car and we passed out.
on sunday we got up and ate breakfast and then sophie did some yoga and i took a nap in the sun and then sophie and i went to brunch. after brunch we walked down thru the garden to the coast and climbed rocks and got our feet in the water. some birds ate the togo food we wrapped up for katie.
at 2pm we left big sur and a few hrs later we were eating in n out again and going to the pumpkin patch. we got hella pumps and cracked so many jokes and laughed at all the babies in their costumes having to pose for photographs.
at this time i texted john,
"we carving pumpkins later tonight at my place. u in?"
nothing.
we got back to the city a little before 8 and everyone helped us carry in our pumpkins. we made hard apple cider and had a carve fest.
we are having a halloween party on saturday and the theme is the nightmare before christmas, so all of our pumpkins we xmas themed. i made a snowman on fire. and a little heart pumpkin. lots of folks came over and it was just so super fun.
at 8:54pm i get a text from john,
"Lucille I am drizzzzzzzzzzzunked.. Hard to text.. Hard to focus.. Have fune.."
what an asshole.
today i am going to work for amit for a few hours and then head over to montgomery for the first time and see how it goes. tonight katie's dad is coming to the city and they are having dinner together. i might just kick it real low key-z.
i love cali.
Friday, October 23, 2009
the art of making friends
man, i've been called an "outcast" here in sf one too many times these past three weeks.
i'm usually such a friend magnet. but at the same time, if we don't click, i'm not going to spend a ton of time on you.
i'm trying more and more to hang out with anyone who gives me the opportunity.
last night katie had tickets to the opera and matt, al and cody all had rugby practice so i was boohooing around the house wishing i had friends. annie came over (to freak on matt, they are SO dating now) and told me she was going to a bbq at her place and invited me.
now, i love booze and bbqs and wanted some new friends, so i totally said yes.
we headed over to the market and then to her place, which is pretty rad. her roommate alice was there and smoked us some bowls and we drank a couple of beers and girl talked. after like an hour or so we were all wondering where everyone was/bbq. eric came over, ravished, and so he, annie and i walked to safeway for coals and instant mashed potatoes. we came back, lit up the grill, and chilled pretty hard.
another boy, james, came over and a gal who's name escapes me now, stopped by as well. i ate salad and instant mash and probably spoke like 15 words the whole time.
i was suuuuuuuuuper stoned (this gal alice like sells hella drugs and does hella drugs and works a 8-5 financial job and rages and idk how she does it). and didnt really click with neone neway.
i totally bailed at the end of the night when ihad to come let katie in the gate. i told everyone i would meet them at pilsner, but i totez bounced.
im sure they all think im a weirdo.
fuck everyone.
the point of this story is that i need to make some friends.
amit?
idk. im heading to big sur with katie and sophie tonight. all good.
shitty post. sry.
i'm usually such a friend magnet. but at the same time, if we don't click, i'm not going to spend a ton of time on you.
i'm trying more and more to hang out with anyone who gives me the opportunity.
last night katie had tickets to the opera and matt, al and cody all had rugby practice so i was boohooing around the house wishing i had friends. annie came over (to freak on matt, they are SO dating now) and told me she was going to a bbq at her place and invited me.
now, i love booze and bbqs and wanted some new friends, so i totally said yes.
we headed over to the market and then to her place, which is pretty rad. her roommate alice was there and smoked us some bowls and we drank a couple of beers and girl talked. after like an hour or so we were all wondering where everyone was/bbq. eric came over, ravished, and so he, annie and i walked to safeway for coals and instant mashed potatoes. we came back, lit up the grill, and chilled pretty hard.
another boy, james, came over and a gal who's name escapes me now, stopped by as well. i ate salad and instant mash and probably spoke like 15 words the whole time.
i was suuuuuuuuuper stoned (this gal alice like sells hella drugs and does hella drugs and works a 8-5 financial job and rages and idk how she does it). and didnt really click with neone neway.
i totally bailed at the end of the night when ihad to come let katie in the gate. i told everyone i would meet them at pilsner, but i totez bounced.
im sure they all think im a weirdo.
fuck everyone.
the point of this story is that i need to make some friends.
amit?
idk. im heading to big sur with katie and sophie tonight. all good.
shitty post. sry.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
coffee nap
erca's here.
thug lyfe.
getting up early blows.
working rulez.
on sunday night i met erica at bart and we came home and smoked with cody n matt n al n ate banana bread and went to sleep. on monday after work erica met me on valencia in the middle of a monsoon (after taking yoga) and we walked home and got hypothermia. later, we went to a bar down the street called black bird. they had $3 wells and and photobooth! eric n i took some amazing pics and had a drank and played hangman. then we went to the corner store and bought a bottle of whiskey. al had a bunch of people over for a cocktail party and we.got.drunk.
this morning i woke up at seven am and went to work for papyrus but sadly, not amit today. i was super happy of course to have the afternoon off and chill with eric. we smoked with matt n cody n then walked to get pizza and place an order for a rug for katie and buy some bunny teeth and get a hot cookie and a coffee. we ran into cody n matt n annie on the way home and said hey then came home then so did they. smoked some cigs, some bowls, now its coffee nap.
tonight we goin to elixir for trivia and im going to face the tender who did not call/text me to hang. im a look good.
Saturday, October 17, 2009
sunny california
god, it's so beautiful here.
palm trees.
erica is coming tomorrow!
my jobs are great.
we had a party last night. well, a fiesta. stuart and mich had bdays and erybody had tacos.
we stuffed 7 people in a cab out to the marina and went to a bar called eastside west. dannnnnnnnnnnnnncing. alex joseph is so cute. katie loves him.
sophie and wes came and met us and drove me n katie back home where we taco'd it up and al and matt and cody and alex took a cab. we smoked a joint, went to bed.
this dream.
im never waking up.
palm trees.
erica is coming tomorrow!
my jobs are great.
we had a party last night. well, a fiesta. stuart and mich had bdays and erybody had tacos.
we stuffed 7 people in a cab out to the marina and went to a bar called eastside west. dannnnnnnnnnnnnncing. alex joseph is so cute. katie loves him.
sophie and wes came and met us and drove me n katie back home where we taco'd it up and al and matt and cody and alex took a cab. we smoked a joint, went to bed.
this dream.
im never waking up.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
boy crazy
friday just keeps getting better and better as we all start putting more pieces together.
i guess matt barfed a couple times on the street. he also broke a glass at 500 after the sox lost and then another glass at elixir bumping into some dudes arm. also, he lit my hair on fire lighting my cig.
hahaha.
sunday.
katie and i went to the produce market across from safeway and got some num nums. then we came back home and katie cut my hair out on the stoop. matt n i smoked cigs while she cut and then cody made fun of me for getting my hair did for my big date on monday.
then i walked to the bart and rode to walnut creek where emily met me. we went to her place and picked up her mom and met her dog and drove her mom to grandma's house. then we drove to target and i bought some all black work clothes. i got a pair of black flats and a pair of black snakeskinish wedges and a super hawt black dress and a cool black top and some shampooing. then we went to the grocery and bought groceries for her and her mom slash our delicious meal. after we dropped off the groceries it was time to pick up emilys mom and so we did and then came home and began roasting a chicken. yes, roasting a chicken.
it was awesome. it took like 2 hours and we didnt eat until 11pm BUT in the mean time we did smoke bowls and drink wine and i started emily's car for her (just luck) and we made green beans and banana bread. omg.
so then i went on okc forEVER and talked to zoe about her casual encounter (love it). then we went to bed.
monday.
woke up. went for a walk. ate toast. emily packed me a lunch and drove me to bart.
read my book on bart and broke my heart more.
ugh, its so good. go read it.
at 12:30 i get a text from john,
"hey lucille, u awake"
"silly john, yes. im on my way to work for a couple of hours"
"want to catch dinner when ur off? assuming ur off around 5ish..."
"totally. ill prob b done around 4"
went to work. drooled over amit.
then. at 4:19pm i receive a text from john,
"have u been to la mediteranee?"
"nope"
"do u like Mediterranean food?"
"yep"
"great. when can u be there?"
"an hr?"
etc.
so, im like at the post office while we're texting and then i have to stop by the office and drop shit off (bc the post office is closed on columbus day, duh) and then get home and change into something adorable and smell good by 5:30.
turns out he has to work at 6:30 so we only have a little time together neway.
so im hauling buns to get home and by the time i get home i am drenched in sweat and have to completely change outfits.
so we say we'll meet at 5:15 and at 5:20 i walk in and there he is, soooooooooooo cute, sitting at the front of the restaurant waiting for me.
dream boat.
we chit chat the whole time, never a lull. he's sooooooo cute. omg a bear.
food was amazing. he bought it. i thanked him.
he had to go to work. we had a little hug outside and then parted ways.
i felt like i should have said something more about what a great time i had or like let him know that i want to hang out again. so after i got home and ran it by katie i decided to text him,
"so, when can i see u again?"
now, i know that he had just gone to work and shouldnt be texting and is probably busy but it didnt stop me from feeling anxious about getting a reply. and so, an hour and a half later, after not hearing back, i know i know so faux pas, i texted again!
"maybe i can buy you some drinks next night youre not working. hit me up"
a half hour later i get,
"sounds like a plan stan"
omg. i real hope i can get him drunk and mack on him.
so im at home and i take a shower and i get out and i hear out the window matt downstairs on the phone obvi trying to get al to let him in. i stick my head out the window and from his perspective im naked. i let him in and he makes a joke about seduction. (if only he knew how true it were.)
then i got online and told micah olson he was a babe and he said he'd be in cali next month and we can hook up. i gave him my number.
so katie comes home and matt, al, stuart, katie and i watch some glee and donnie from okc is texting me about hanging out but decides not to and then matt n al n i go out.
we meet cody on the street otw to the pilzner (the spot they all regularly frequent. like, their elixir). matt buys me a drink and we go out and meet some friends of theirs and smoke cigs and a joint and then cody buys me a drink and then we all go to qbar for dollar wells.
i get myself one and go out onto the smoking patio dooda. for like an hour i sat speaking to no one and just drinking and watching and it was so crowded and matt is soooo in love with annie who is soooo in love with chris who is sooo into himself and only himself. whatev. so we head back inside at last call and chris and i get another drink and chris buys me a shot and we take them.
i can tell that chris is flirting with me but srsly only bc im the only girl there who is a. straight b. single c. not his ex (annie). so annie who is still in love with chris is hating on me and matt who is in love with annie is just chasing chasing and all the while im thinking matt should just be into me.
so al and cody and i walk home and al makes scrambled eggs and i make a burrito and cody makes pasta. and we drunkenly feast.
then i got in bed and, bc im a retard / know that hes up bc he told me he would b and know he has to do a huge exam the next day, i text john AGAIN.
"good luck tomorrow"
"thanks. i hope the four hours i sleep i get are good ones!"
"they'll b awesome"
then i went on okc and messaged my ibf mikey that i was hella into him and want him to come to california.
then i passed out.
tuesday.
slept until the last poss minute. its raaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiining!
i had a dream that my foot hurt and so i pulled off my boot and pulled of my long sock and looked under my big left toenail for the ow-y and a spider came out!
omg i shot up in bed.
otw to work today i tripped on the curb.
otw to do the mailing my umbrella flipped up three times.
but amit is so beautiful that my day really turned around.
today he said to me,
"ur the best!"
then i came home and put on cozies and ate a sandwich and sophie came over and had a phone interview that went awesome and she got a second interview!
and then she make dried fruit and almond platters and now im eating that and shes talking to her mom on the phone and i think im going to go smoke a cig.
oh wowee. boyz boyz boyz. love them all, all the time.
i guess matt barfed a couple times on the street. he also broke a glass at 500 after the sox lost and then another glass at elixir bumping into some dudes arm. also, he lit my hair on fire lighting my cig.
hahaha.
sunday.
katie and i went to the produce market across from safeway and got some num nums. then we came back home and katie cut my hair out on the stoop. matt n i smoked cigs while she cut and then cody made fun of me for getting my hair did for my big date on monday.
then i walked to the bart and rode to walnut creek where emily met me. we went to her place and picked up her mom and met her dog and drove her mom to grandma's house. then we drove to target and i bought some all black work clothes. i got a pair of black flats and a pair of black snakeskinish wedges and a super hawt black dress and a cool black top and some shampooing. then we went to the grocery and bought groceries for her and her mom slash our delicious meal. after we dropped off the groceries it was time to pick up emilys mom and so we did and then came home and began roasting a chicken. yes, roasting a chicken.
it was awesome. it took like 2 hours and we didnt eat until 11pm BUT in the mean time we did smoke bowls and drink wine and i started emily's car for her (just luck) and we made green beans and banana bread. omg.
so then i went on okc forEVER and talked to zoe about her casual encounter (love it). then we went to bed.
monday.
woke up. went for a walk. ate toast. emily packed me a lunch and drove me to bart.
read my book on bart and broke my heart more.
ugh, its so good. go read it.
at 12:30 i get a text from john,
"hey lucille, u awake"
"silly john, yes. im on my way to work for a couple of hours"
"want to catch dinner when ur off? assuming ur off around 5ish..."
"totally. ill prob b done around 4"
went to work. drooled over amit.
then. at 4:19pm i receive a text from john,
"have u been to la mediteranee?"
"nope"
"do u like Mediterranean food?"
"yep"
"great. when can u be there?"
"an hr?"
etc.
so, im like at the post office while we're texting and then i have to stop by the office and drop shit off (bc the post office is closed on columbus day, duh) and then get home and change into something adorable and smell good by 5:30.
turns out he has to work at 6:30 so we only have a little time together neway.
so im hauling buns to get home and by the time i get home i am drenched in sweat and have to completely change outfits.
so we say we'll meet at 5:15 and at 5:20 i walk in and there he is, soooooooooooo cute, sitting at the front of the restaurant waiting for me.
dream boat.
we chit chat the whole time, never a lull. he's sooooooo cute. omg a bear.
food was amazing. he bought it. i thanked him.
he had to go to work. we had a little hug outside and then parted ways.
i felt like i should have said something more about what a great time i had or like let him know that i want to hang out again. so after i got home and ran it by katie i decided to text him,
"so, when can i see u again?"
now, i know that he had just gone to work and shouldnt be texting and is probably busy but it didnt stop me from feeling anxious about getting a reply. and so, an hour and a half later, after not hearing back, i know i know so faux pas, i texted again!
"maybe i can buy you some drinks next night youre not working. hit me up"
a half hour later i get,
"sounds like a plan stan"
omg. i real hope i can get him drunk and mack on him.
so im at home and i take a shower and i get out and i hear out the window matt downstairs on the phone obvi trying to get al to let him in. i stick my head out the window and from his perspective im naked. i let him in and he makes a joke about seduction. (if only he knew how true it were.)
then i got online and told micah olson he was a babe and he said he'd be in cali next month and we can hook up. i gave him my number.
so katie comes home and matt, al, stuart, katie and i watch some glee and donnie from okc is texting me about hanging out but decides not to and then matt n al n i go out.
we meet cody on the street otw to the pilzner (the spot they all regularly frequent. like, their elixir). matt buys me a drink and we go out and meet some friends of theirs and smoke cigs and a joint and then cody buys me a drink and then we all go to qbar for dollar wells.
i get myself one and go out onto the smoking patio dooda. for like an hour i sat speaking to no one and just drinking and watching and it was so crowded and matt is soooo in love with annie who is soooo in love with chris who is sooo into himself and only himself. whatev. so we head back inside at last call and chris and i get another drink and chris buys me a shot and we take them.
i can tell that chris is flirting with me but srsly only bc im the only girl there who is a. straight b. single c. not his ex (annie). so annie who is still in love with chris is hating on me and matt who is in love with annie is just chasing chasing and all the while im thinking matt should just be into me.
so al and cody and i walk home and al makes scrambled eggs and i make a burrito and cody makes pasta. and we drunkenly feast.
then i got in bed and, bc im a retard / know that hes up bc he told me he would b and know he has to do a huge exam the next day, i text john AGAIN.
"good luck tomorrow"
"thanks. i hope the four hours i sleep i get are good ones!"
"they'll b awesome"
then i went on okc and messaged my ibf mikey that i was hella into him and want him to come to california.
then i passed out.
tuesday.
slept until the last poss minute. its raaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiining!
i had a dream that my foot hurt and so i pulled off my boot and pulled of my long sock and looked under my big left toenail for the ow-y and a spider came out!
omg i shot up in bed.
otw to work today i tripped on the curb.
otw to do the mailing my umbrella flipped up three times.
but amit is so beautiful that my day really turned around.
today he said to me,
"ur the best!"
then i came home and put on cozies and ate a sandwich and sophie came over and had a phone interview that went awesome and she got a second interview!
and then she make dried fruit and almond platters and now im eating that and shes talking to her mom on the phone and i think im going to go smoke a cig.
oh wowee. boyz boyz boyz. love them all, all the time.
Saturday, October 10, 2009
dreams do come true
well, shit. if i get struck by lightning, know i earned it.
lady luck is on my side.
i got hired at papyrus.
i'm in love with amit.
hot tender texted me. and we're hanging out on monday. what?
i got sooooooooooooo drunk last night.
me and al and matt went down to elixir about seven (after having a cocktail at home).
they weren't playing the sox games so we had to go somewhere else. (matt.)
we went down the street to 500 and bought a round and then katie came to meet us. i think i had four drinks there.
then we went to elixir after the game and as i approached the bar, so did he.
"hey lucille, what are you having?"
(swoon, sigh, omg)
"whiskey diet."
i bought everyone's drinks.
i wrote my number on a napkin and hung onto it for a while.
i dont remember much of this part of the night.
katie was talking to a hella hot indian dude.
i leaned across the bar.
"hey."
"sup?"
"i'm trying to hang out with you."
"cool. sunday?"
"no."
"monday?"
"ok."
"what do you want to do?"
"whatever. here's my number."
he takes the napkin and lights it on fire with the candle and blows it out. (omg hawwwwwwwt.)
"i'll call you on monday."
i have no idea what happened after that.
i imagine i was hella drunk and chatting with someone or no one, or trying to text, maybe squinting one eye... hahaha i kill myself.
i remember maybe saying like, "you better call me." and him saying, "i'll call you on monday."
then like katie and i were linked arms, maybe running? i lost a shoe. i found it. i woke up.
haha waking up was hilarious. katie like got up out of bed like chasing after whoever was leaving the house because she had dreamt that someone was here and being sneak and scandalous.
i guess we ate pupusas when we got home. katie told me this. and then al told me that matt puked on the street twice. hahaha omg. and we were like home by midnight. ridiculous.
i looked at my phone this morning and had a text from John from last night at 11:42 saying, "Hey lucy. this is john."
werid that he called me lucy bc he always calls me lucille. which i love.
i texted back at 11:52am "yo john. sry i was so wastey."
katie and i walked to a garage sale and otw there we stopped at this like mexi church weekend fiesta block party food from all over the world and i got a pupusa and a diet coke and felt amazing.
the garage sale ruled and we got a rug, a lamp, and a beer for $11.
carrying the rug home was amazing bc it was huge and i was drinking a beer out of a red cup. we walked by elixir and made eye contact with john who was in there sitting at the bar. ?
when we got home i had a text from him saying, "no worries. these things happen to the best of us."
then i went with al to her uncle's house.
we took the muni then bus 47 (on which al and i both became hungover) and then hiked a huge hill to her uncle's house. which is amazing. we went up on the roof and got beers and met hella amazing great people and watched the blue angels jet show. it was soooooooo coooooool.
at one point they made a heart in the sky and then an arrow going thru it.
omg.
then we ate hella bomb croissandwiches and baked doritos and stella artois and cigarettes and laughing.
then cody and matt picked us up and we came home and ian smoked me out and cody found his license and katie and al made dinner and now im going to eat it.
lady luck is on my side.
i got hired at papyrus.
i'm in love with amit.
hot tender texted me. and we're hanging out on monday. what?
i got sooooooooooooo drunk last night.
me and al and matt went down to elixir about seven (after having a cocktail at home).
they weren't playing the sox games so we had to go somewhere else. (matt.)
we went down the street to 500 and bought a round and then katie came to meet us. i think i had four drinks there.
then we went to elixir after the game and as i approached the bar, so did he.
"hey lucille, what are you having?"
(swoon, sigh, omg)
"whiskey diet."
i bought everyone's drinks.
i wrote my number on a napkin and hung onto it for a while.
i dont remember much of this part of the night.
katie was talking to a hella hot indian dude.
i leaned across the bar.
"hey."
"sup?"
"i'm trying to hang out with you."
"cool. sunday?"
"no."
"monday?"
"ok."
"what do you want to do?"
"whatever. here's my number."
he takes the napkin and lights it on fire with the candle and blows it out. (omg hawwwwwwwt.)
"i'll call you on monday."
i have no idea what happened after that.
i imagine i was hella drunk and chatting with someone or no one, or trying to text, maybe squinting one eye... hahaha i kill myself.
i remember maybe saying like, "you better call me." and him saying, "i'll call you on monday."
then like katie and i were linked arms, maybe running? i lost a shoe. i found it. i woke up.
haha waking up was hilarious. katie like got up out of bed like chasing after whoever was leaving the house because she had dreamt that someone was here and being sneak and scandalous.
i guess we ate pupusas when we got home. katie told me this. and then al told me that matt puked on the street twice. hahaha omg. and we were like home by midnight. ridiculous.
i looked at my phone this morning and had a text from John from last night at 11:42 saying, "Hey lucy. this is john."
werid that he called me lucy bc he always calls me lucille. which i love.
i texted back at 11:52am "yo john. sry i was so wastey."
katie and i walked to a garage sale and otw there we stopped at this like mexi church weekend fiesta block party food from all over the world and i got a pupusa and a diet coke and felt amazing.
the garage sale ruled and we got a rug, a lamp, and a beer for $11.
carrying the rug home was amazing bc it was huge and i was drinking a beer out of a red cup. we walked by elixir and made eye contact with john who was in there sitting at the bar. ?
when we got home i had a text from him saying, "no worries. these things happen to the best of us."
then i went with al to her uncle's house.
we took the muni then bus 47 (on which al and i both became hungover) and then hiked a huge hill to her uncle's house. which is amazing. we went up on the roof and got beers and met hella amazing great people and watched the blue angels jet show. it was soooooooo coooooool.
at one point they made a heart in the sky and then an arrow going thru it.
omg.
then we ate hella bomb croissandwiches and baked doritos and stella artois and cigarettes and laughing.
then cody and matt picked us up and we came home and ian smoked me out and cody found his license and katie and al made dinner and now im going to eat it.
Friday, October 9, 2009
friday afternoon is the new friday night
i love sf.
i love katie.
i love amit.
i love photojojo.com.
i love Phoenix.
i love my friends in pdx.
i love the unbearable lightness of being.
i hate that even with all this love and goodness comes fear of it leaving me eventually.
ah, this brain. must learn to discipline. must love love love free free freedom.
i love katie.
i love amit.
i love photojojo.com.
i love Phoenix.
i love my friends in pdx.
i love the unbearable lightness of being.
i hate that even with all this love and goodness comes fear of it leaving me eventually.
ah, this brain. must learn to discipline. must love love love free free freedom.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
in the middle, somewhat elevated
today was great.
thursday.
i slept until 10. blogged, showered, blogged. listened to bon iver. walked to work. on the walk i talked to my bro who loved on my fight.
"wait, wait wait, you told a lesbian to eat a dick? siiiiiiiiiiiick!! u dyke bruiser!"
got to work and made a rough video of the photojojo book. amit got there after an hour or so and then we made a few more videos until we had it perfect. he's such a dream boat.
i left work around 4 and went and got an incredible burrito from a place simply called, Taqueria. got on the bart and went to west Oakland where sophie met me. we went into this adorable new grocery co-op and bought strawberries. while we were checking out i mentioned my burrito and the guy asked if we were making strawberry burritos. then we all three went off on how rad it would be to make dessert burritos with strawberries and whip cream and a sweet tortilla - then the other cashier turns to us and is like, "isn't that called a crepe?"
omg we died of retardedness.
then we walked back to sophies BEAUTIFUL AMAZING WONDERFUL place with high high ceilings and cozy cozy vibez. katie came over and we all hung out and chit chatted and listened to music while i put together a towel tower for sophie's bathroom. loved it. at 9ish we went out to this bar called Eli's which was a total dive and the best. they had 209 gin on special for $4 and i played three rounds of pinball. then we went outside and hella tournamented free air hockey. i won against katie, then i won against sophie, then katie won against sophie, then i won against katie again. thats right, undefeated.
then we went back to sophie's where she hooked us up with hella clothes and books she's getting rid of and then took us to the bart. on the ride home i read more of The Unbearable Lightness Of Being. gawd, im obsessed. it keeps making me fall in love and then breaking my heart. very deep. very emo. love love love.
we came home and manged for a bit. cheese and pears and some pumpkin bread omg.
then here i am, about to watch glee on hulu.
oh, i got a text from dakota today that said, "Dude! I heard you got hired. Is it tru?"
and i didnt know if it was real, or like an attempt to get me to write back to her. i decided to not reply bc if it is true than eventually someone will call me and tell me. then on the bart home tonight i realized i had a missed call and voicemail as well as a text. the vm was something like, "hey girl, wanted to see whats up, shit, call me, fuck, youve got my number..."
im thinking of calling tomorrow or something. i just like dont even know what to say. i cant be a supportive friend and i dont want to get involved in ANY drama with that beezy again. the bruise on my jaw is bright black today.
it would b so bomb to have that job though.
i miss my friends. i really love it here.
thursday.
i slept until 10. blogged, showered, blogged. listened to bon iver. walked to work. on the walk i talked to my bro who loved on my fight.
"wait, wait wait, you told a lesbian to eat a dick? siiiiiiiiiiiick!! u dyke bruiser!"
got to work and made a rough video of the photojojo book. amit got there after an hour or so and then we made a few more videos until we had it perfect. he's such a dream boat.
i left work around 4 and went and got an incredible burrito from a place simply called, Taqueria. got on the bart and went to west Oakland where sophie met me. we went into this adorable new grocery co-op and bought strawberries. while we were checking out i mentioned my burrito and the guy asked if we were making strawberry burritos. then we all three went off on how rad it would be to make dessert burritos with strawberries and whip cream and a sweet tortilla - then the other cashier turns to us and is like, "isn't that called a crepe?"
omg we died of retardedness.
then we walked back to sophies BEAUTIFUL AMAZING WONDERFUL place with high high ceilings and cozy cozy vibez. katie came over and we all hung out and chit chatted and listened to music while i put together a towel tower for sophie's bathroom. loved it. at 9ish we went out to this bar called Eli's which was a total dive and the best. they had 209 gin on special for $4 and i played three rounds of pinball. then we went outside and hella tournamented free air hockey. i won against katie, then i won against sophie, then katie won against sophie, then i won against katie again. thats right, undefeated.
then we went back to sophie's where she hooked us up with hella clothes and books she's getting rid of and then took us to the bart. on the ride home i read more of The Unbearable Lightness Of Being. gawd, im obsessed. it keeps making me fall in love and then breaking my heart. very deep. very emo. love love love.
we came home and manged for a bit. cheese and pears and some pumpkin bread omg.
then here i am, about to watch glee on hulu.
oh, i got a text from dakota today that said, "Dude! I heard you got hired. Is it tru?"
and i didnt know if it was real, or like an attempt to get me to write back to her. i decided to not reply bc if it is true than eventually someone will call me and tell me. then on the bart home tonight i realized i had a missed call and voicemail as well as a text. the vm was something like, "hey girl, wanted to see whats up, shit, call me, fuck, youve got my number..."
im thinking of calling tomorrow or something. i just like dont even know what to say. i cant be a supportive friend and i dont want to get involved in ANY drama with that beezy again. the bruise on my jaw is bright black today.
it would b so bomb to have that job though.
i miss my friends. i really love it here.
delerium
idk why blogger crops my images and fucks me over so hard?
yesterday we did a photo shoot for a new camera that is like a polaroid but its smaller and prints out like business card sized pics. the concept was to have like two pictures come together as one. for ex. a pic of one person kissing and a pic of another person kissing and then put the two together to look like their kissing. so what we did was i high kicked and laurel acted like she was getting kicked in the face. and then we put them together with her holding the pics together in one hand and her sore face in the other.
katie came to meet me at work and got to do the shoot with us. we did chest bumping.
then we walked to the bank and then the farmers market and then the corner store to buy bourbon.
at home i ate an awesome sandwich and we made hot toddies.
then we went to elixir.
they were doing some benefit and having volunteers bartend and katie had some co-workers tending. so homie wasnt there. ive got a new bar trick. its called ppl leaving their drinks unattended and me taking them. some dudes left the bar and when they did they left like a full pint of ipa. my ipa. mipa. we met some dude named Galen who accompanied us down the street to Delerium where instantly i changed over from elixir.
not two minutes into sitting at the bar do two hot pro skaters compliment my hat and buy me a tecate. yep. then they introduced me to all like eight of their skating friends. theyre from seattle and met some chick from amsterdam who offered to drive them to frisco for a few days. i love this city.
closed the bar down.
they went to oakland to crash somewhere after discovering that my place was not an option.
Galen and i walked up the street together.
then i drunk dialed Nicholas. bc im a retard.
i need to find some new ppl to drunk dial.
then i ate a sandwich and talked shit with michael (who im not sure quite knew i was wasted).
now im going to go eat a sandwich and walk to work and then bart to sophies and go to a junkyard and then do a clothing swap.
hollllllllllllllllller
yesterday we did a photo shoot for a new camera that is like a polaroid but its smaller and prints out like business card sized pics. the concept was to have like two pictures come together as one. for ex. a pic of one person kissing and a pic of another person kissing and then put the two together to look like their kissing. so what we did was i high kicked and laurel acted like she was getting kicked in the face. and then we put them together with her holding the pics together in one hand and her sore face in the other.
katie came to meet me at work and got to do the shoot with us. we did chest bumping.
then we walked to the bank and then the farmers market and then the corner store to buy bourbon.
at home i ate an awesome sandwich and we made hot toddies.
then we went to elixir.
they were doing some benefit and having volunteers bartend and katie had some co-workers tending. so homie wasnt there. ive got a new bar trick. its called ppl leaving their drinks unattended and me taking them. some dudes left the bar and when they did they left like a full pint of ipa. my ipa. mipa. we met some dude named Galen who accompanied us down the street to Delerium where instantly i changed over from elixir.
not two minutes into sitting at the bar do two hot pro skaters compliment my hat and buy me a tecate. yep. then they introduced me to all like eight of their skating friends. theyre from seattle and met some chick from amsterdam who offered to drive them to frisco for a few days. i love this city.
closed the bar down.
they went to oakland to crash somewhere after discovering that my place was not an option.
Galen and i walked up the street together.
then i drunk dialed Nicholas. bc im a retard.
i need to find some new ppl to drunk dial.
then i ate a sandwich and talked shit with michael (who im not sure quite knew i was wasted).
now im going to go eat a sandwich and walk to work and then bart to sophies and go to a junkyard and then do a clothing swap.
hollllllllllllllllller
Monday, October 5, 2009
really??
so.
last night.
dakota sleeps at my place. you know, bc her ex beat me up.
we have a hard long chat about how she doesnt want to see her ever again and wont even speak to her for a looooooooooonnnnnnnnng time bc what she did was unexcuseable.
just moments ago i get a text that she's sleeping at her place.
??????????????????????????
dakota: "hey girl hey. I'm sorry your body hurts. How's your face? I'm cool. I been talkin to alex. She is gravel central. Total remorse, shame, change. There were lots of apologies and flowers. I'm still mad. It's not all good, but i'm talking to her. Don't worry boo, i'm no Bitch. How you tho? i love you."
me: "r u staying w her?"
dakota: "Yeah. It's cool. Don't worry. Please don't think i'm a Bitch. I know what i'm doin."
BULLLLLLLLLLLLL SHIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTTT.
dude, she is a bitch. and fuck both those bitches.
i need to find a new roommate. asap.
last night.
dakota sleeps at my place. you know, bc her ex beat me up.
we have a hard long chat about how she doesnt want to see her ever again and wont even speak to her for a looooooooooonnnnnnnnng time bc what she did was unexcuseable.
just moments ago i get a text that she's sleeping at her place.
??????????????????????????
dakota: "hey girl hey. I'm sorry your body hurts. How's your face? I'm cool. I been talkin to alex. She is gravel central. Total remorse, shame, change. There were lots of apologies and flowers. I'm still mad. It's not all good, but i'm talking to her. Don't worry boo, i'm no Bitch. How you tho? i love you."
me: "r u staying w her?"
dakota: "Yeah. It's cool. Don't worry. Please don't think i'm a Bitch. I know what i'm doin."
BULLLLLLLLLLLLL SHIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTTT.
dude, she is a bitch. and fuck both those bitches.
i need to find a new roommate. asap.
damn, it feels good to b a gangster
monday.
i found amit on okc yesterday. i told him today. awesome.
other than that, everything seems low key compared to the full moon last night.
jedd sent me a song he made. its awesome.
i have all these boys.
nicholas sent me a text last night after i texted him about the fight, ew so gross im embarrassed to repeat it.
him: youre a gangster
me: thx babe
(this is the one)
him: no problem baby boo
ugh.
i like him. ew.
annoying.
and now im about to go call jedd because he called me yesterday and sent me that email and texted me.... okok ill call him.
so many boys.
my body is sore.
like my arm and shoulder. my head. my eye. i got rowdied last night.
dude, i am a gangster.
i found amit on okc yesterday. i told him today. awesome.
other than that, everything seems low key compared to the full moon last night.
jedd sent me a song he made. its awesome.
i have all these boys.
nicholas sent me a text last night after i texted him about the fight, ew so gross im embarrassed to repeat it.
him: youre a gangster
me: thx babe
(this is the one)
him: no problem baby boo
ugh.
i like him. ew.
annoying.
and now im about to go call jedd because he called me yesterday and sent me that email and texted me.... okok ill call him.
so many boys.
my body is sore.
like my arm and shoulder. my head. my eye. i got rowdied last night.
dude, i am a gangster.
in just one week
sunday.
i slept in.
feeling great.
wake up to a text from joey price wanting to hang out. i told him about the castro street fair and that dakota was doing a mermaid show and he told me he'd be at my place soon.
we meet up and walk down the street to the fair. its so cool. tons of people, tons of stages, tons of drag queens. so we walk around and see the sights and find dakotas mermaid pool. we bought a beer and i hugged dakotas mom and met her friend andrea (the pirate in the show with her). dakota hooks us up with some passes and we get free sandwiches. (the date is going well). we see dakotas show which is super funny and andrea plays the accordian, violin, and guitar. after the show joey and i walk to the park and hang out watching this dude try to play smash ball with this homeless guy. it was the funniest shit all day. dude would gently serve the ball to home-y and home-y would smash it like 30' away. and then patiently the dude would go get it and serve it gently again etc etc. joey's really cool. super funny and a nice dude and i hope he wants to hang out again.
as we're leaving the park dakota calls me and reminds me that we took off with her passes so i have to go back to give them to her and joey has to go to rehearsal. we hug and say bye and i go back to merm town.
there, dakota and andrea are getting ready for the show and dakotas girlfriend (who hides this fact because she's not out of the closet yet, regardless of the fact that shes had a two year relationship with a girl and now a nine month relationship with dakota...cukoo bitch) and friend john are outside waiting for the show to start. we all kind of hang out and watch the show and then as they are closing down etc alex and john head off to a bar for us to meet them at after the cleaning up is finished.
i ask dakota why her gf is acting like a little bitch and dakota tells me that they got in a fight a couple of days ago because dakota was looking at her too much at a party and alex got all in her face telling her "don't be so obvious." how infuriating. so dakota's been in "the dog house" for hte past couple of days and i think its all bullshit.
we go out to Qbar and they all buy drinks. i however, find some unattended gin and tonics and totally snatch them like the hobo that i am. aka we're having an awesome time.
its like 6:30 and the club is bumping like its 3am. people are so rowdy from the street fair and just ohhhh bumpin n grinding. my faves were these two middle-aged asian lesbians that didnt know how to dance but oh did they love to.
at some point in our dancing and fun having times i look over and see alex (the not-out lesbo bitch) sitting with her legs spread and this little pixie girl rubbing her thighs and holding her hands and grabbing her boobs and im like "dakota, wtf?!?" dakota gets eyes on he situation and we are like, out. we go smoke a cig and walk around the block and try to justify her behavior as being excited to be in a gay friendly bar getting hit on by a chick. (im still like, eh eh, thats ur gf, none of that). so we go back to the bar and theyre not talking anymore so dakota goes to the bathroom. the moment she leaves alex gets up and is rubbing on pixie girl and they go outside together. dakota comes back and i am in a rage and im like lets go check this out.
we go outside and they are holding hands and exchanging numbers. dakota walks up and hands alex her purse and is like, "oh hey guys, really? really, alex?" and we walk away. we get not half a block away when dakota turns around with fire in her eyes and goes back to them:
dakota: "what the fuck?! do you know that this girl isn't even OUT yet??"
pixie: "hehe, yeah, she told me."
dakota: "well, its a real sensitive subject so y'all must be pretty close. (to alex) how is it that you can come out to a gay bar on CASTRO street and just mack on ANY random girl and not be gay?!?! (to pixie) it was great to meet you. thank you. have an awesome night together."
alex: (to pixie) "just ignore her."
ooooooh we so pissed. we walk down the street with andrea, dakota is sobbing, john comes to meet us we have a big long talk. dakota is calming down and things are looking up for our evening when low and behold alex walks up the street.
alex: "dakota you are such an asshole. i did this because you hurt me the other day. this is your punishment. YOU ARE NOT MY GIRLFRIEND."
dakota: "then get out of my face."
etc etc
she leaves. more crying ensues. im raging pissed and was srsly biting my tongue the whole time and trying not to hit a bitch.
we decide to get food.
we go to baghdad cafe and everyone starts to chill out a bit. alex is calling dakota non-stop so much so that her phone dies. shes calling john like crazy. she leaves d all these messages about what an asshole she is and john puts her on speaker phone and shes like "dakota ur an asshole" so i hang up his phone. then she calls back beggggging to talk to d who wont talk to her so i say, "ill tlak to her." and i get on the phone and i say,
"eat a fucking dick bitch haHAAA"
and hang up.
she keeps calling and calling and i dont know why but john tells her where we are.
she comes up in the restaurant yelling and causing a scene. comes right up to me and yells, "i never talked to anybody like that! ooh girl im so fucking mad at you...."
the waitress comes up and is like, you need to leave. and all of us at the table are like yes she does. alex starts yelling at the waitress and the waitress goes to call the cops. alex is like, "dakota talk to me talk to me..... i wont leave until you talk to me....just come outside with me." meanwhile andrea is standing up in her face talking her down, telling her shes embarrassing herself and needs to leave. finally waitress comes up and is like you all have to leave if shes with you. so dakota agrees to walk her out the door so that we can get rid of her and continue our meal.
as dakota stands up she creates a gap between me (up against the window in the corner of the room and the spot where she was sitting) and alex rushes me.
she punches me in the eye and grabs me by the hair. i immediately stand up, "WHAT!?!?!?" and throw a glass of water in her face and grab onto her doorag. she pulls me across the room knocking over tables and chairs and john and andrea are trying to pull her off of me. she rips my necklace off and breaks it and still has me by the hair. so there are like two feet of hair separating me n her and in these two feet are andrea and john. i cant even see or reach her.
they get her off of me and i grab my things, apologize to the waitress and walk out the door towards katies house.
she jumps me from behind grabbing my hair again and takes me down to the ground. andrea cop grabs her and slams her against the newspaper stands and a big guy from inside the restaurant comes out and takes me with him inside and says he'll protect me.
at this point, a huge chunk of hair falls out of my head onto the table. and i start to cry.
the cops come and im pressing charges.
we walk back home and i smoke as many cigs as i possibly can.
dakota sleeps over with me and has over 50 missed calls, 30 texts, 15 voicemails. bitch is crazy. and aint no way they getting back together.
so,
ive been here a week and i already have a black eye.
san fran.
i slept in.
feeling great.
wake up to a text from joey price wanting to hang out. i told him about the castro street fair and that dakota was doing a mermaid show and he told me he'd be at my place soon.
we meet up and walk down the street to the fair. its so cool. tons of people, tons of stages, tons of drag queens. so we walk around and see the sights and find dakotas mermaid pool. we bought a beer and i hugged dakotas mom and met her friend andrea (the pirate in the show with her). dakota hooks us up with some passes and we get free sandwiches. (the date is going well). we see dakotas show which is super funny and andrea plays the accordian, violin, and guitar. after the show joey and i walk to the park and hang out watching this dude try to play smash ball with this homeless guy. it was the funniest shit all day. dude would gently serve the ball to home-y and home-y would smash it like 30' away. and then patiently the dude would go get it and serve it gently again etc etc. joey's really cool. super funny and a nice dude and i hope he wants to hang out again.
as we're leaving the park dakota calls me and reminds me that we took off with her passes so i have to go back to give them to her and joey has to go to rehearsal. we hug and say bye and i go back to merm town.
there, dakota and andrea are getting ready for the show and dakotas girlfriend (who hides this fact because she's not out of the closet yet, regardless of the fact that shes had a two year relationship with a girl and now a nine month relationship with dakota...cukoo bitch) and friend john are outside waiting for the show to start. we all kind of hang out and watch the show and then as they are closing down etc alex and john head off to a bar for us to meet them at after the cleaning up is finished.
i ask dakota why her gf is acting like a little bitch and dakota tells me that they got in a fight a couple of days ago because dakota was looking at her too much at a party and alex got all in her face telling her "don't be so obvious." how infuriating. so dakota's been in "the dog house" for hte past couple of days and i think its all bullshit.
we go out to Qbar and they all buy drinks. i however, find some unattended gin and tonics and totally snatch them like the hobo that i am. aka we're having an awesome time.
its like 6:30 and the club is bumping like its 3am. people are so rowdy from the street fair and just ohhhh bumpin n grinding. my faves were these two middle-aged asian lesbians that didnt know how to dance but oh did they love to.
at some point in our dancing and fun having times i look over and see alex (the not-out lesbo bitch) sitting with her legs spread and this little pixie girl rubbing her thighs and holding her hands and grabbing her boobs and im like "dakota, wtf?!?" dakota gets eyes on he situation and we are like, out. we go smoke a cig and walk around the block and try to justify her behavior as being excited to be in a gay friendly bar getting hit on by a chick. (im still like, eh eh, thats ur gf, none of that). so we go back to the bar and theyre not talking anymore so dakota goes to the bathroom. the moment she leaves alex gets up and is rubbing on pixie girl and they go outside together. dakota comes back and i am in a rage and im like lets go check this out.
we go outside and they are holding hands and exchanging numbers. dakota walks up and hands alex her purse and is like, "oh hey guys, really? really, alex?" and we walk away. we get not half a block away when dakota turns around with fire in her eyes and goes back to them:
dakota: "what the fuck?! do you know that this girl isn't even OUT yet??"
pixie: "hehe, yeah, she told me."
dakota: "well, its a real sensitive subject so y'all must be pretty close. (to alex) how is it that you can come out to a gay bar on CASTRO street and just mack on ANY random girl and not be gay?!?! (to pixie) it was great to meet you. thank you. have an awesome night together."
alex: (to pixie) "just ignore her."
ooooooh we so pissed. we walk down the street with andrea, dakota is sobbing, john comes to meet us we have a big long talk. dakota is calming down and things are looking up for our evening when low and behold alex walks up the street.
alex: "dakota you are such an asshole. i did this because you hurt me the other day. this is your punishment. YOU ARE NOT MY GIRLFRIEND."
dakota: "then get out of my face."
etc etc
she leaves. more crying ensues. im raging pissed and was srsly biting my tongue the whole time and trying not to hit a bitch.
we decide to get food.
we go to baghdad cafe and everyone starts to chill out a bit. alex is calling dakota non-stop so much so that her phone dies. shes calling john like crazy. she leaves d all these messages about what an asshole she is and john puts her on speaker phone and shes like "dakota ur an asshole" so i hang up his phone. then she calls back beggggging to talk to d who wont talk to her so i say, "ill tlak to her." and i get on the phone and i say,
"eat a fucking dick bitch haHAAA"
and hang up.
she keeps calling and calling and i dont know why but john tells her where we are.
she comes up in the restaurant yelling and causing a scene. comes right up to me and yells, "i never talked to anybody like that! ooh girl im so fucking mad at you...."
the waitress comes up and is like, you need to leave. and all of us at the table are like yes she does. alex starts yelling at the waitress and the waitress goes to call the cops. alex is like, "dakota talk to me talk to me..... i wont leave until you talk to me....just come outside with me." meanwhile andrea is standing up in her face talking her down, telling her shes embarrassing herself and needs to leave. finally waitress comes up and is like you all have to leave if shes with you. so dakota agrees to walk her out the door so that we can get rid of her and continue our meal.
as dakota stands up she creates a gap between me (up against the window in the corner of the room and the spot where she was sitting) and alex rushes me.
she punches me in the eye and grabs me by the hair. i immediately stand up, "WHAT!?!?!?" and throw a glass of water in her face and grab onto her doorag. she pulls me across the room knocking over tables and chairs and john and andrea are trying to pull her off of me. she rips my necklace off and breaks it and still has me by the hair. so there are like two feet of hair separating me n her and in these two feet are andrea and john. i cant even see or reach her.
they get her off of me and i grab my things, apologize to the waitress and walk out the door towards katies house.
she jumps me from behind grabbing my hair again and takes me down to the ground. andrea cop grabs her and slams her against the newspaper stands and a big guy from inside the restaurant comes out and takes me with him inside and says he'll protect me.
at this point, a huge chunk of hair falls out of my head onto the table. and i start to cry.
the cops come and im pressing charges.
we walk back home and i smoke as many cigs as i possibly can.
dakota sleeps over with me and has over 50 missed calls, 30 texts, 15 voicemails. bitch is crazy. and aint no way they getting back together.
so,
ive been here a week and i already have a black eye.
san fran.
Saturday, October 3, 2009
lovefest
im kind of sick. ive been telling myself its allergies, but im lying.
either way.
friday.
so i get up and i get dressed for my interview and i go to work for amit and i post some things on ebay and then amit goes to move or find his car or something and before he gets back its already time for me to go to my interview. so i tell jen bye and leave the office and go to 18th & mission and get on the 14L and head to embarcadero. i get off the bus and walk over to these like huge towers and in EC2 (embarcadero center 2) building is like an indoor/outdoor mall kinda thang. and i go up the escalator into papyrus. i meet ivon or iman or iran or whatev her name is (shes gorgeous model from across the world who is now regional manager of papyrus) and we have our interview. it goes awesome and as im leaving she tells me shes really excited and will get back to me next week.
so i leave ec2 for the bus and for the first time so far in san fran i DIDNT do what my iphone told me and i hopped on a trolly on a whim that said it was going to market/castro. (i live on market in the castro) so im cruising along with hella tourists just fittin right in, seeing the sights, loving the trip. it def took longer but like, what did i have to do yesterday.
so i finally get home and i say hey to stuart/stewart and then take a lil nap (aka i went on okc for like 3 hours). zoe and i chatted online (which is my fave) and i chatted up some homies and exchanged some dig's.
evening rolls around and Al and Michael go the corner store to buy liquor. im still deciding if im staying home sick or attempting to go out. al's friend matt comes over and i ask them if they want to get hi (get me hi that is) and they do. we smoke some bowls then matt hooks me up with a cig and we get to know each other a little bit.
at first i didnt know if he was gay or straight (its hard to tell sometimes out here) but i knew that he was super cute either way. he's tall. like 6+, brown hair, ck boxer briefs that i can see poking out, just all around cute dude. he's going to school for philosophy right now (sigh) and thinking of changing his major or double-majoring in genetics (sigh).
they finally convince me to go out with them by offering to a. buy me drinks, b. at elixir.
homie's not there but we meet another dude alex (al's coworker friend) who's great. matt proceeds to buy me three whiskey diets and give me hella cigs.
we go up the street to Toad Hall and i get a tonic and lime. i know. i know. more cigs, some new gay friends who added me on fb today. then we walk to vince & stu's.
vince n stu are al and her bf cody and his bff matt 's friends. they live in a baller apt up on the hill overlooking the city. a ma zing. cody and matt are cat-sitting for them whilst they are out of town and we went over there and went to bowwwwwwwwwl town. matt and i smoked a cig together out on the porch at like 2:30am just like admiring the city and being so happy we live here. he's been in the city 5 months. he's like, really cool. he was couch surfing and staying with his dad for the last while and is going to school and trying to find a job and just, really on the same level.
so like 3am rolls around and im feeling only kind of weird about not actually knowing any of these people who are all hella besties, so i decide to walk home.
this walk.
it was only like 15 minutes but the streets were just so empty and quiet and beautiful. all the homes are beautiful. and i could just picture myself in france walking down the narrow streets with high houses alone in the middle of the night feeling silly and contemplating what snacks would be available once i got home. the sky was wide, full of stars. it was a great feeling.
saturday.
today in sf is Love Fest ( now called LovEvolution but no one calls it that). at noon there's a large parade of floats and fags just raging in the streets covered in body glitter and wearing little shorts or spandex or both. i guess its a huge downtown crazy party.
michael dressed in tiny green running shorts and a white vneck (so hawt) and covered himself in body glitter. he did a one-handed hand stand today for me (he's an acrobat) it was awesome. he's amazing. we shared a weed truffle. (i'd like to take this opportunity to say that i didnt get hi and that all the bowls we smoked yesterday, i felt kinda the same way. can i not get hi nemore or does this sf weed suck?) neway, then michael ate a shroom truffle and took off to go meet his friends for lovefest and later tonight after al's big rugby game and drinkathon that follows, all of them are going to do e. cukoo.
the other thing going on in the city today is the Hardly Strictly Bluegrass festival that is a three day concert event with multi stages and lots of cool performers. Sophie and her roommate Sofia came over today and met me about 1:45pm and we all took muni over to golden gate park and went to the bluegrass thang. it was packed with people which is always crazy when you're outside. we saw steve martin. and pretty much spent like 40 mins there just talking to one another and catching up and loving it. then we walked the other direction out of the park to get on the bus again. we took the 31 and i got off at arguella and walked over to the 33 bus, got off on 18th and noe and walked home. im starting to really figure some things out.
so i came home and ate the rest of my salad from earlier and made some tomato soup which is where i am now. dipping stale baguette into delicious soup and blowing my nose every five seconds.
im thinking about watching some netflix and taking it real easy and drifting to sleep soon. yes, its 6pm as i type this... i must really be sicka nd broke to be saying smthg like that on the saturday night of love fest in san francisco. ha.
right, well, i guess i should bring up okc. last night this boy joey price from okc was texting me and inviting me to a party and we obv didnt go, but i also invited him to toad hall and he didnt make it before we left so idk maybe he'll text me later and want to hang out or maybe not.
also, this boy david and i have been texting and he lives in santa rosa or clara or somewhere thats not here. either way he seems adorable and i hope to meet him soon and maybe he'll be cool and maybe the distance won't matter but really
i mean
really
what im saying is
i want a bf.
ugh.
gay, i know.
i'm going to go fantasize about elixir boy asking me to move in with him.
lovefest
either way.
friday.
so i get up and i get dressed for my interview and i go to work for amit and i post some things on ebay and then amit goes to move or find his car or something and before he gets back its already time for me to go to my interview. so i tell jen bye and leave the office and go to 18th & mission and get on the 14L and head to embarcadero. i get off the bus and walk over to these like huge towers and in EC2 (embarcadero center 2) building is like an indoor/outdoor mall kinda thang. and i go up the escalator into papyrus. i meet ivon or iman or iran or whatev her name is (shes gorgeous model from across the world who is now regional manager of papyrus) and we have our interview. it goes awesome and as im leaving she tells me shes really excited and will get back to me next week.
so i leave ec2 for the bus and for the first time so far in san fran i DIDNT do what my iphone told me and i hopped on a trolly on a whim that said it was going to market/castro. (i live on market in the castro) so im cruising along with hella tourists just fittin right in, seeing the sights, loving the trip. it def took longer but like, what did i have to do yesterday.
so i finally get home and i say hey to stuart/stewart and then take a lil nap (aka i went on okc for like 3 hours). zoe and i chatted online (which is my fave) and i chatted up some homies and exchanged some dig's.
evening rolls around and Al and Michael go the corner store to buy liquor. im still deciding if im staying home sick or attempting to go out. al's friend matt comes over and i ask them if they want to get hi (get me hi that is) and they do. we smoke some bowls then matt hooks me up with a cig and we get to know each other a little bit.
at first i didnt know if he was gay or straight (its hard to tell sometimes out here) but i knew that he was super cute either way. he's tall. like 6+, brown hair, ck boxer briefs that i can see poking out, just all around cute dude. he's going to school for philosophy right now (sigh) and thinking of changing his major or double-majoring in genetics (sigh).
they finally convince me to go out with them by offering to a. buy me drinks, b. at elixir.
homie's not there but we meet another dude alex (al's coworker friend) who's great. matt proceeds to buy me three whiskey diets and give me hella cigs.
we go up the street to Toad Hall and i get a tonic and lime. i know. i know. more cigs, some new gay friends who added me on fb today. then we walk to vince & stu's.
vince n stu are al and her bf cody and his bff matt 's friends. they live in a baller apt up on the hill overlooking the city. a ma zing. cody and matt are cat-sitting for them whilst they are out of town and we went over there and went to bowwwwwwwwwl town. matt and i smoked a cig together out on the porch at like 2:30am just like admiring the city and being so happy we live here. he's been in the city 5 months. he's like, really cool. he was couch surfing and staying with his dad for the last while and is going to school and trying to find a job and just, really on the same level.
so like 3am rolls around and im feeling only kind of weird about not actually knowing any of these people who are all hella besties, so i decide to walk home.
this walk.
it was only like 15 minutes but the streets were just so empty and quiet and beautiful. all the homes are beautiful. and i could just picture myself in france walking down the narrow streets with high houses alone in the middle of the night feeling silly and contemplating what snacks would be available once i got home. the sky was wide, full of stars. it was a great feeling.
saturday.
today in sf is Love Fest ( now called LovEvolution but no one calls it that). at noon there's a large parade of floats and fags just raging in the streets covered in body glitter and wearing little shorts or spandex or both. i guess its a huge downtown crazy party.
michael dressed in tiny green running shorts and a white vneck (so hawt) and covered himself in body glitter. he did a one-handed hand stand today for me (he's an acrobat) it was awesome. he's amazing. we shared a weed truffle. (i'd like to take this opportunity to say that i didnt get hi and that all the bowls we smoked yesterday, i felt kinda the same way. can i not get hi nemore or does this sf weed suck?) neway, then michael ate a shroom truffle and took off to go meet his friends for lovefest and later tonight after al's big rugby game and drinkathon that follows, all of them are going to do e. cukoo.
the other thing going on in the city today is the Hardly Strictly Bluegrass festival that is a three day concert event with multi stages and lots of cool performers. Sophie and her roommate Sofia came over today and met me about 1:45pm and we all took muni over to golden gate park and went to the bluegrass thang. it was packed with people which is always crazy when you're outside. we saw steve martin. and pretty much spent like 40 mins there just talking to one another and catching up and loving it. then we walked the other direction out of the park to get on the bus again. we took the 31 and i got off at arguella and walked over to the 33 bus, got off on 18th and noe and walked home. im starting to really figure some things out.
so i came home and ate the rest of my salad from earlier and made some tomato soup which is where i am now. dipping stale baguette into delicious soup and blowing my nose every five seconds.
im thinking about watching some netflix and taking it real easy and drifting to sleep soon. yes, its 6pm as i type this... i must really be sicka nd broke to be saying smthg like that on the saturday night of love fest in san francisco. ha.
right, well, i guess i should bring up okc. last night this boy joey price from okc was texting me and inviting me to a party and we obv didnt go, but i also invited him to toad hall and he didnt make it before we left so idk maybe he'll text me later and want to hang out or maybe not.
also, this boy david and i have been texting and he lives in santa rosa or clara or somewhere thats not here. either way he seems adorable and i hope to meet him soon and maybe he'll be cool and maybe the distance won't matter but really
i mean
really
what im saying is
i want a bf.
ugh.
gay, i know.
i'm going to go fantasize about elixir boy asking me to move in with him.
lovefest
Thursday, October 1, 2009
ah, dang
san fran.
where to begin
sunday.
i got off the plane sunday. katie scooped me up at the port and we came home for a brief moment. we went out to this spot Elixir. i kept thinking that erica and i had gone there on our trip thru cali in may, but we might have just seen it down the road. its on 16th and guerrero and this cool chick with a huge fro works there. the bartender's name was Ben and katie was insta in love. on the way there we had seen some dudes cross the street and i had said to katie that i thought bearded homie was cute. low and behold, i go smoke a cig and a taxi pulls up with said homie (and company) and they roll up to elixir. we make eye contact across the bar a couple of times as he's dipping his finger first in his drink and next in a candle, catching his finger on fire for a moment and waving it around (we call this showing off) then blowing it out. (he was totally trying to impress me). he's totally my type. short (maybe 5'7) brown hair, beard, grey amer apar shirt. so eventually he comes over to our side of the bar and sits down next to me. after a few minutes he gets up and goes behind the bar and starts fixing himself a drink. its at this point that katie and i realize that he's a bartender there. now katie and i are both falling in love with this bar. so homie comes back and sits down next to me again and this time i make a move. "so, what you work here or something?" he tells me yes, obviously and after only a brief amount of small talk the convo leads me to asking him his age. it went from there something like this:
me: "how old are you?"
him: "how old are YOU?"
me: "i asked you first"
him: "what's your sign?"
me: "what?!"
him: "what's your sign?"
me: "tell me how old are you are first"
him: "27"
me: "gemini"
him: "we can't date."
me: "excuse me??"
him: "i mean, i wasn't implying that we were going to date before all this but, well, my last two gfs were geminis so..."
me: "ew, what's your sign?"
him: "picies"
me: "23"
him: "you're a baby"
the conversation died shortly afterwords, but i was still intrigued.
$40 tab. and then we went home and to bed.
monday.
katie wakes up early to go to work, i attempt to form words like "have a good day" but instead like snore/talk nothing. my alarm goes off at 9, 9:30, 10, 10:30... finally, feeling hungover AND excited (confusing emotionally/physically to be so opposite) i get out of bed around 11. I shower and dress and then call Frank Garvey of Omnicircus. He tells me to come by as soon as i can so i look up the bus and head to the circus. im feeling very confident and excited and happy and great and ive had a little coffee so i got a little kick in my step and i get there and all my dreams are shattered into a million pieces. the place is a shit hole. no windows, packed full of metal sculptures and robots and dirt and ew and bleh. Frank's an asshole and over the course of the two hours i spent there he told me i was full of shit, a loser and had no social skills. i had to sing, tell everyone about myself in a presentation, answer group questions, listen to 12 minutes of uninterrupted cukoo music alone in a dark office full of CRAP and take all the bullshit blasphemy he was spitting to me about what a genious he is, greatest composer of 20th century, next beethoven, compared his music to the mona lisa, blablabla. then he forced me to buy a 2 disc cd for $20 and the moment i left the theatre tears poured down my face.
i took the bus back to the castro and (unable to get into katies place) sat at bagdhad cafe for three hours venting on the phone, chugging coffee, and not eating my fucking $10 blt on fucking WHITE bread (kill me). after the venting was over and i cooled down a bit i went back to katies locked gate and waited outside of it until a neighbor let me into the courtyard. i sat on the stoop until emily got there and we decided it was time for a drink.
we went down to this spot called Qbar (its a gay bar, pretty sure q means queer) and got two-for-one drinks. feeling a little tipsy after the second drink we headed over to a pizza place across the way and got some slices to go. we came back to katie's and stuart/stewart (?) let us in. we ate pizza and smoked a couple of bowls and did a tarot reading. the reading was crazy. emily picked the first four cards and then i picked the last one. the one i picked represented my past and omg was it cukoo town. #7 the cart. spirit and shape, victory and triumph, propriety. it was gemini and had the date of gem starting on may 22 (bday) which only occasionally is the cusp (usually 21). it said shit like, lots of excitement for awesome shit followed by defeat, failure, let down... whatev hokity pokity it tripped my balls and made me believe and i decided failure was in the past.
katie came home from her opera class and we all chilled a bit and ate some foodies (the blt from before) and then emily had to get going so she could catch the train back to walnut creek.
sleep.
tuesday.
i wake up. excited about my interview with amit (ah-mit) a little nauseous (kind of my new thing). i shower. i get cute (team dress). i head out to Ritual Coffee Roasters on Valencia and like 21st. I get there and scan around the room. i dont see him. i grab an iced coffee and a seat at the bar. moments later this adorable brown boy with black facial hair and a white hoodie walks in the shop. i know instantly this is amit. then my phone blows up, text from amit, "hey, are you here? i dont know what you look like. im wearing a white hoodie." and i text back, "i c u. im at the bar." we make eye contact, smiles, lets grab a table. short sweet intros and a couple q's here n there. mostly i can just tell we enjoy each others company, we both young and hip and genuinely nice peeps. after like 15 mins he's like, "we cant possibly get to know each other well enough in fifteen minutes, why dont you come in and work for me for a week and we'll see how it goes." money bags.
so im walking on sunshine and then emily tells me she'll pick me up at the bart and i can work for her dad for $10/hr helping him move and paint and spackle in berkley. literal money.
after 7 hours of walking up n down stairs carrying boxes of crap, hanging out with smelly kids from down the hall enlisted as heavy-movers, and eating burritos i made out with $50 cash and a ride back to the bart station. not bad seeing as emily and i took hella breaks and i got a sweet ass burrito. bart home. well, not quite.
see the bart stop closest to home happens to be on 16th & mission. two blocks away from home. the block between: guerrero & 16th, aka: Elixir. i couldnt help myself. so i went in and ordered a drink. homie wasnt there and some blond chick was tending. of course (bc of my new tarot good fortune kick) it was trivia night. katie got there as fast as she could. we were team meat. low n behold moments into round one he appears. barbacking. hot. after a couple of sideways glances he finally comes over and asks me,
him: "did i meet you on sunday?"
me: "yeah, you're a picies."
him: "oh yeah."
some minor chit chat betwixt trivia questions and somehow i get him to fix me a drink (free, duh). delicious, duh. one free drink leads to two, leads to half-off, leads to ive had about four drinks now and katie's going home. i stay. homie gets off and sits down at the bar next to me buying dranks and chatting a bit. we laugh about how drunk he was on sunday and how he's kind of embarrassed about the gemini thing. "i mean, we can still date, its cool." (or something close enough to that to make that what i "remember" him saying). i close my tab and the dude asks the rerun my card. i make sure hes voided the last one and then (bc im a lush, AND bc its my trademark move) i totally order another drink after closing my tab. tender hooks me up with yet another freebie (to apologize about the card rerunning). come to learn that homie's name is John. he likes my name and says it a lot when we speak to each other. i find out that he lives on the same street as me and i have to hold myself back from asking him to walk me home. ok, ok, i swear, this is my LAST drink (im at 7 now). num nums, feeling shaky awesome. bar is closing down and i am getting myself outta there. some farewells to my new friends and a high five from John (i live for these simple pleasures).
so im walking home and my phone has been dying all night but somehow has enough in it to receive a call from dakota telling me to come meet up with her only three blocks away. i had to. so i head over to where she's at somewhere on market and octavia st and running down the street screaming at me is baby kota. we go to this bar that is totally shut down yet somehow full of like 15 of dakotas friends. instantly she hands me a shot of tequila. we catch up. some hot tino hands me a shot of whiskey. cigs. omg. and i get a ride home where i eat the rest of my burrito and snore all over katie.
wednesday.
first day at photojojo. got there early. my first day of work revolved around this bicycle that yahoo made that has a solar panel on the back that powers this camera on the front. so when the bike is moving, the camera takes a pic every 60 secs. so i got to make a sign for the bike that tells folks on the street to shake its handlebars and pose for the red light. the camera then sends all the pics to flickr. then i took the bike out on the town and did a photo shoot with it so that we can create a poster about the bike. real fun stuff. lovin on erybody who works there.
after work i come home and katie and i go to the farmers market and buy yum yums. come home and eat. smoke a teeny tiny bowl we found. and hang with her roomies til beddy time.
thursday.
got up. showered. sat on the window sill and watched the cars go by. got ready. bussed to papyrus stationary shop where dakota works. filled out an application and on my way back to the bus stop got a call from her boss tellin gme about my interview tomorrow at 3 at the embarcadero location. money.
so i miss my bus and get another one to photojojo where amit has hella things for me to do today. first i go buy a wedding card for amit's friends. then i fill out this rebate form and take it, a book, the card, and a box of plates 7 blocks to the post office. sweaaaaaaaaaty. then i walked back to the office where i picked up a box of 10 books and a sign that needs laminating and get on the bus to Joby. at Joby i give the box of books and a blow pop (blow pops accompany any delivery) to joel who thanks me graciously for the lolli. back on the bus to another bus to the copy shop for laminating. i get back to the office about 5 and its time to take off.
on my way home i do what has now officially become a routine of walking by elixir and i peer inside seeing not John. moments later im home and katie calls me telling me shes walking by elixir and john's sitting at the bar. mf. we eat sandwiches and katie goes to opera class. i watch stella on netflix watch instantly, surf okc, fb, cl and now this.
my life is awesome right now. keep it up.
where to begin
sunday.
i got off the plane sunday. katie scooped me up at the port and we came home for a brief moment. we went out to this spot Elixir. i kept thinking that erica and i had gone there on our trip thru cali in may, but we might have just seen it down the road. its on 16th and guerrero and this cool chick with a huge fro works there. the bartender's name was Ben and katie was insta in love. on the way there we had seen some dudes cross the street and i had said to katie that i thought bearded homie was cute. low and behold, i go smoke a cig and a taxi pulls up with said homie (and company) and they roll up to elixir. we make eye contact across the bar a couple of times as he's dipping his finger first in his drink and next in a candle, catching his finger on fire for a moment and waving it around (we call this showing off) then blowing it out. (he was totally trying to impress me). he's totally my type. short (maybe 5'7) brown hair, beard, grey amer apar shirt. so eventually he comes over to our side of the bar and sits down next to me. after a few minutes he gets up and goes behind the bar and starts fixing himself a drink. its at this point that katie and i realize that he's a bartender there. now katie and i are both falling in love with this bar. so homie comes back and sits down next to me again and this time i make a move. "so, what you work here or something?" he tells me yes, obviously and after only a brief amount of small talk the convo leads me to asking him his age. it went from there something like this:
me: "how old are you?"
him: "how old are YOU?"
me: "i asked you first"
him: "what's your sign?"
me: "what?!"
him: "what's your sign?"
me: "tell me how old are you are first"
him: "27"
me: "gemini"
him: "we can't date."
me: "excuse me??"
him: "i mean, i wasn't implying that we were going to date before all this but, well, my last two gfs were geminis so..."
me: "ew, what's your sign?"
him: "picies"
me: "23"
him: "you're a baby"
the conversation died shortly afterwords, but i was still intrigued.
$40 tab. and then we went home and to bed.
monday.
katie wakes up early to go to work, i attempt to form words like "have a good day" but instead like snore/talk nothing. my alarm goes off at 9, 9:30, 10, 10:30... finally, feeling hungover AND excited (confusing emotionally/physically to be so opposite) i get out of bed around 11. I shower and dress and then call Frank Garvey of Omnicircus. He tells me to come by as soon as i can so i look up the bus and head to the circus. im feeling very confident and excited and happy and great and ive had a little coffee so i got a little kick in my step and i get there and all my dreams are shattered into a million pieces. the place is a shit hole. no windows, packed full of metal sculptures and robots and dirt and ew and bleh. Frank's an asshole and over the course of the two hours i spent there he told me i was full of shit, a loser and had no social skills. i had to sing, tell everyone about myself in a presentation, answer group questions, listen to 12 minutes of uninterrupted cukoo music alone in a dark office full of CRAP and take all the bullshit blasphemy he was spitting to me about what a genious he is, greatest composer of 20th century, next beethoven, compared his music to the mona lisa, blablabla. then he forced me to buy a 2 disc cd for $20 and the moment i left the theatre tears poured down my face.
i took the bus back to the castro and (unable to get into katies place) sat at bagdhad cafe for three hours venting on the phone, chugging coffee, and not eating my fucking $10 blt on fucking WHITE bread (kill me). after the venting was over and i cooled down a bit i went back to katies locked gate and waited outside of it until a neighbor let me into the courtyard. i sat on the stoop until emily got there and we decided it was time for a drink.
we went down to this spot called Qbar (its a gay bar, pretty sure q means queer) and got two-for-one drinks. feeling a little tipsy after the second drink we headed over to a pizza place across the way and got some slices to go. we came back to katie's and stuart/stewart (?) let us in. we ate pizza and smoked a couple of bowls and did a tarot reading. the reading was crazy. emily picked the first four cards and then i picked the last one. the one i picked represented my past and omg was it cukoo town. #7 the cart. spirit and shape, victory and triumph, propriety. it was gemini and had the date of gem starting on may 22 (bday) which only occasionally is the cusp (usually 21). it said shit like, lots of excitement for awesome shit followed by defeat, failure, let down... whatev hokity pokity it tripped my balls and made me believe and i decided failure was in the past.
katie came home from her opera class and we all chilled a bit and ate some foodies (the blt from before) and then emily had to get going so she could catch the train back to walnut creek.
sleep.
tuesday.
i wake up. excited about my interview with amit (ah-mit) a little nauseous (kind of my new thing). i shower. i get cute (team dress). i head out to Ritual Coffee Roasters on Valencia and like 21st. I get there and scan around the room. i dont see him. i grab an iced coffee and a seat at the bar. moments later this adorable brown boy with black facial hair and a white hoodie walks in the shop. i know instantly this is amit. then my phone blows up, text from amit, "hey, are you here? i dont know what you look like. im wearing a white hoodie." and i text back, "i c u. im at the bar." we make eye contact, smiles, lets grab a table. short sweet intros and a couple q's here n there. mostly i can just tell we enjoy each others company, we both young and hip and genuinely nice peeps. after like 15 mins he's like, "we cant possibly get to know each other well enough in fifteen minutes, why dont you come in and work for me for a week and we'll see how it goes." money bags.
so im walking on sunshine and then emily tells me she'll pick me up at the bart and i can work for her dad for $10/hr helping him move and paint and spackle in berkley. literal money.
after 7 hours of walking up n down stairs carrying boxes of crap, hanging out with smelly kids from down the hall enlisted as heavy-movers, and eating burritos i made out with $50 cash and a ride back to the bart station. not bad seeing as emily and i took hella breaks and i got a sweet ass burrito. bart home. well, not quite.
see the bart stop closest to home happens to be on 16th & mission. two blocks away from home. the block between: guerrero & 16th, aka: Elixir. i couldnt help myself. so i went in and ordered a drink. homie wasnt there and some blond chick was tending. of course (bc of my new tarot good fortune kick) it was trivia night. katie got there as fast as she could. we were team meat. low n behold moments into round one he appears. barbacking. hot. after a couple of sideways glances he finally comes over and asks me,
him: "did i meet you on sunday?"
me: "yeah, you're a picies."
him: "oh yeah."
some minor chit chat betwixt trivia questions and somehow i get him to fix me a drink (free, duh). delicious, duh. one free drink leads to two, leads to half-off, leads to ive had about four drinks now and katie's going home. i stay. homie gets off and sits down at the bar next to me buying dranks and chatting a bit. we laugh about how drunk he was on sunday and how he's kind of embarrassed about the gemini thing. "i mean, we can still date, its cool." (or something close enough to that to make that what i "remember" him saying). i close my tab and the dude asks the rerun my card. i make sure hes voided the last one and then (bc im a lush, AND bc its my trademark move) i totally order another drink after closing my tab. tender hooks me up with yet another freebie (to apologize about the card rerunning). come to learn that homie's name is John. he likes my name and says it a lot when we speak to each other. i find out that he lives on the same street as me and i have to hold myself back from asking him to walk me home. ok, ok, i swear, this is my LAST drink (im at 7 now). num nums, feeling shaky awesome. bar is closing down and i am getting myself outta there. some farewells to my new friends and a high five from John (i live for these simple pleasures).
so im walking home and my phone has been dying all night but somehow has enough in it to receive a call from dakota telling me to come meet up with her only three blocks away. i had to. so i head over to where she's at somewhere on market and octavia st and running down the street screaming at me is baby kota. we go to this bar that is totally shut down yet somehow full of like 15 of dakotas friends. instantly she hands me a shot of tequila. we catch up. some hot tino hands me a shot of whiskey. cigs. omg. and i get a ride home where i eat the rest of my burrito and snore all over katie.
wednesday.
first day at photojojo. got there early. my first day of work revolved around this bicycle that yahoo made that has a solar panel on the back that powers this camera on the front. so when the bike is moving, the camera takes a pic every 60 secs. so i got to make a sign for the bike that tells folks on the street to shake its handlebars and pose for the red light. the camera then sends all the pics to flickr. then i took the bike out on the town and did a photo shoot with it so that we can create a poster about the bike. real fun stuff. lovin on erybody who works there.
after work i come home and katie and i go to the farmers market and buy yum yums. come home and eat. smoke a teeny tiny bowl we found. and hang with her roomies til beddy time.
thursday.
got up. showered. sat on the window sill and watched the cars go by. got ready. bussed to papyrus stationary shop where dakota works. filled out an application and on my way back to the bus stop got a call from her boss tellin gme about my interview tomorrow at 3 at the embarcadero location. money.
so i miss my bus and get another one to photojojo where amit has hella things for me to do today. first i go buy a wedding card for amit's friends. then i fill out this rebate form and take it, a book, the card, and a box of plates 7 blocks to the post office. sweaaaaaaaaaty. then i walked back to the office where i picked up a box of 10 books and a sign that needs laminating and get on the bus to Joby. at Joby i give the box of books and a blow pop (blow pops accompany any delivery) to joel who thanks me graciously for the lolli. back on the bus to another bus to the copy shop for laminating. i get back to the office about 5 and its time to take off.
on my way home i do what has now officially become a routine of walking by elixir and i peer inside seeing not John. moments later im home and katie calls me telling me shes walking by elixir and john's sitting at the bar. mf. we eat sandwiches and katie goes to opera class. i watch stella on netflix watch instantly, surf okc, fb, cl and now this.
my life is awesome right now. keep it up.
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
ugh
Intoxication.
It was like freedom never felt so free in America. Something about waking up unsure every morning. Seeing a world you only read about. One full of love and adventure, sweet smells of bread and oh, the wine. The fondest memories of France were those of the wine.
It wasn't that I went there to escape but I found myself running the whole time. The drinks were so sweet and the disappearing act so enticing. No one knew my name, my story. I doubt they even cared. One drunk American, all drunk Americans.
I didn't learn much. Sure, I picked up the language, but like most of my life, I just let myself slip in and out of reality long enough to re-learn that nothing really matters. And my debts will continue to pile up. And my glasses will fill themselves.
It was like freedom never felt so free in America. Something about waking up unsure every morning. Seeing a world you only read about. One full of love and adventure, sweet smells of bread and oh, the wine. The fondest memories of France were those of the wine.
It wasn't that I went there to escape but I found myself running the whole time. The drinks were so sweet and the disappearing act so enticing. No one knew my name, my story. I doubt they even cared. One drunk American, all drunk Americans.
I didn't learn much. Sure, I picked up the language, but like most of my life, I just let myself slip in and out of reality long enough to re-learn that nothing really matters. And my debts will continue to pile up. And my glasses will fill themselves.
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
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